Self Loss

Don’t tell me I don’t know what loss is. I’ve lost more than you can imagine. I’ve lost so many people, people I never thought were capable of leaving a bruise. I remember watching a boy I once knew when I was young in a shopping centre. I remember wanting to talk to him and deciding not to. I remember my trembling body later that night when his name was mentioned in the caption of a picture that showed smashed metal and glass. That boy lost his life that day, and although he didn’t mean much to me I felt the loss. However I didn’t feel it as intensely as I did when the first boy I loved crushed my soul. I lost that boy then and it hurt like hell. I lost him the same way I lost the girl I once called my best friend. But all that loss is not the loss I’m referring to. I’ve lost more than people, because I’ve lost pieces of myself with every single one of them. I’ve lost more than you can imagine. I’ve lost myself. So don’t you dare tell me I have no idea what loss is, for what greater loss is there than this.